Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Hitting the Road: Unhooking the BRA

Today is Tuesday, June 15th, which means two things: 1) I am nursing a throbbingly severe post-Flag Day hangover; and 2) I am about to embark on my BRA tour. This tour will pry me out of my comfort zone like a recalcitrant conch from its shell and foist me onto the world at large like a conch who just published a book. Please note that, while I intend to continue regular blogular updates of this blog, the grueling touring schedule mercilessly imposed on me by my ruthless publisher, Chronicle, (coupled with other factors such as time zone changes, Internet connectivity or lack thereof at the various campgrounds where I will be lodging, and of course travel-induced constipation) may mean that these posts are brief and/or appear at irregular times. Nevertheless, at the very least I shall endeavor to at least file brief daily dispatches from the road until I return home next week. In the meantime, my first stop will be Mellow Johnny's in Austin tomorrow, and I hope to see you at the 10:30am ride--or, if you actually have a job, at the signing/pageant/soirée later that evening. (This being Texas, I will be wearing my SPD-compatible cowboy boots with spurs of crabon fribé.)
Of course, going on a BRA tour means I've got to look my best, so I treated myself to a "day of beauty" yesterday consisting of a manicure, pedicure, facial, haircut, facial haircut, and of course a thorough "sideburn" waxing. (Further to the comments on yesterday's post, other words for "sideburns" include "thighbrows," "koala bear's ears," and "pacoon.") As I made my way about town, I noticed an officer of the law who was actually reading the newspaper while driving:

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